Stop Chasing the Scale… A values-based approach to building discipline, integrity, and lasting fitness (printable worksheets included).

If you’ve been around here for very long, you know I’m a big believer in values based living. It’s one of the reasons I love Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). At its core, ACT teaches us to identify what truly matters to us and then choose actions that align with those values, even when it’s uncomfortable. We stop waiting until we feel motivated, confident, or inspired and begin practicing becoming the kind of person we want to be.

The more I study it, the more I realize that fitness isn’t separate from that work. It’s one of the best places to practice it.

I was checking in with someone I’m working with recently. She told me her clothes were fitting looser. She’d started adding carbohydrates back into her meals and, to her surprise, actually felt leaner. Everything was moving in the right direction, yet she asked a question I think almost everyone has asked at some point.

“How do I stop chasing the scale? How do I stop chasing body perfection?”

And my answer was…

“For the next eight weeks, I don’t want you measuring your body. I want you measuring your discipline.”

The scale is an outcome. Your body is an outcome. Your jean size is an outcome. Discipline is a practice.

Side note:(Throughout this article, I’ll use the words discipline and integrity almost interchangeably. I don’t believe they’re exactly the same, but I do believe discipline is one of the clearest expressions of integrity. Every time we keep a promise to ourselves, we’re practicing both. I tend to think of discipline as integrity in action.)

Every morning you have the opportunity to choose who you’re going to be, and every evening you have the opportunity to ask yourself whether your actions reflected that person.

Did I keep the promises I made to myself today?

Did my food choices reflect my values?

Did I move my body because I value my health?

When life got busy, did I adapt instead of giving up?

Those questions have nothing to do with water retention, hormones, sodium, sleep, or what the scale happened to say that morning. They measure something much deeper.

Research on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy has shown that people are more likely to stick with difficult behaviors when those behaviors are connected to personal values instead of emotions or immediate results. We see the same pattern in behavior change research. Lasting transformation rarely comes from dramatic effort. It comes from small, consistent actions repeated over time until they become part of who we are.

That’s why I think we’ve misunderstood discipline. Most people think discipline means forcing yourself to do things you don’t want to do. I approach discipline as a practice of integrity. It’s about becoming someone who keeps promises to themselves. Your body is just one expression of your integrity. It isn’t the source of it.

Ironically, that’s often when the physical changes begin to happen…become less obsessed with your body and outside appearance and more committed to your values. Accept the body you’re in now (remember my last post about the practice of surrender)…and do the internal work first. The body changes will happen because you’re changing. If you show up for yourself everyday, you will see changes in your body.

One of the things I appreciate most about my Kriya yoga practice is that every day ends with self evaluation. Not self criticism. Self evaluation.There’s an important difference. One comes from shame. The other comes from love.

One asks, “What’s wrong with me?”

The other asks, “What can I learn about myself today?”

I think that’s a practice we’ve lost. Instead of ending the day asking whether you looked good enough, ask yourself different questions.

Did I live according to my values today?

Where did I act with integrity?

Where did I drift away from the person I’m trying to become?

What can I practice tomorrow?

Notice none of those questions require you to judge yourself. They simply invite you to become more aware.

We’re all works in progress. None of us wake up one morning with perfect discipline. We build it the same way we build strength. One repetition at a time. One choice at a time. One promise kept at a time. The discipline muscle grows long before the biceps do.

The mindset shift switches from building a perfect body, to becoming someone who trusts themselves because they’ve learned to live according to their values.

The body takes care of itself a whole lot better when we stop making it the center of the story. Instead, it becomes one reflection of a life lived with integrity. That kind of transformation reaches far beyond fitness, and I think it’s worth pursuing.

To help you pursue integrity in your fitness journey, I want to give you a practical framework to work from. I want to help you learn to live from your values… and I’ll do that by giving you an ACT guide to sustainable health. I’ve included a printable that you can use to clarify your values. After you’ve done that, print the self reflection sheet and use that every evening. Do this practice for one month and let me know how it goes. Values based living has changed my life and if you’re consistent with it, I’m sure that it will have lasting effects on not just your body but in the way you operate in the world.

Much love,

Melissa